(Photo: Daniel Maurer)
As SantaCon gets ready to pop off in the East Village this weekend and its organizers helpfully remind their ruddy-cheeked followers not to pee on things or, uh, rape people, the LES Dwellers have posted the above signs around the Lower East Side. We’re not the only ones who’ve noticed them. Redditors are opining about the humbuggy postings, and — as you can guess — there’s a whole toy bag of opinions about SantaCon. Where do you fall on this spectrum of lovers and haters?
1. The person who hates SantaCon because its participants are bridge and tunnel.
“How is a horde of people who generally (come on you have to give me this one) come in from Long Island and Jersey to barf all over the place for an afternoon considered the “collaboration” that is inherent to the fabric of the city?”
2. The person who hates SantaCon because it represents the tweeification of NYC.
“I literally can not think of a single local who enjoys it, and Santacon is emblematic of a very different, very twee culture that slowly started emerging in New York around 2005 or so.”
3. People with horror stories about past SantaCons.
“Some random girl tried to steal my fiance’s purse and when I confronted her she started going off on me. I told her how full of shit she was and grabbed the bag out of her hand. She then proceeded to cry and throw up all over the floor.”
“We found eight iPhones on the floor that night, after we closed. The next day, most people called to accuse us of stealing their phones only to then ask us if we would kindly hold on to them till they came back into the city to drink the next weekend. Maybe if you didn’t try storing it in your whore-elf costume you wouldn’t have had this problem.”
“It really is terrible almost got into a fight because two bros wanted to act like drunk idiots and go crazy and almost hit my girlfriend while jumping around. Had to push the guy out of the way to make sure he didn’t hit my girlfriend. Had the nerve to get upset.”
4. The drinker who thinks SantaCon is amateur hour.
“I live in the East Village BECAUSE I want to live on a street with a ton of bars. My problem with santacon is that is totally fucking ruins said bars.”
5. The person who’s like, what about the children?
And I hate to think what children think when they see multiple drunken Santa’s fumbling around the streets of New York and vomiting and passing out. Come one, we may be adults, but don’t ruin the holidays for the kids.
6. The person who doesn’t really like it but thinks the LES Dwellers are worse.
“Not the biggest fan of SantaCon, but LESdwellers members are a bunch of whining NIMBY’s. Don’t want to live on a street with a ton of bars? Don’t move to the fucking LES.”
7. The person who enjoyed it until it got big.
“I am a local who has done it since 2006 and (used to) enjoy it. it’s the non-locals who have ruined it.”
8. The person who thinks SantaCon is part of what makes NYC great.
“He’s one of the cool locals who was here before you and doesn’t realize that NY is so great b/c of the ever-evolving diverse group of people that collaborate into what makes NY; New York.”
9. The person who’s like, ef the haters.
“You guys can anti-Santacon circle jerk all you want but it’s not going to stop me and a bunch of other people from going out and having a great time. This sub is so dramatic about it. Do you guys hate St. Patrick’s day just as much? Because it’s the exact same thing.
10. The person who straight-up loves every single thing about SantaCon (possibly a troll)
“I didn’t go last year, but the year before. I thought it was great. I rolled with my crew of hoe-hoe-hoes and my purse of candy canes to give out to random children (made it rain, y’all). I also dropped off cans of food at one of the bars that was collecting, (keepin’ it real). Drunk people can be so friendly…. I still think about you cute drunk girls who kissed me and said I was beautiful while I tottered my way home! And half naked santa… I’m sorry I was so drunk and insisted you take a picture with me in your lap. You looked really confused in the picture upon review when sober.
I never saw the people urinating / vomiting in the streets, but really, they made a nice event terrible. I wish the entirety of Santacon didn’t get such a bad rap from people who can’t handle themselves in public.”