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Sad! What 13 People Would Write on Trump’s Tombstone

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)-(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)-(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)-(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)(Photo: Daniel Leinweber/Razberry Photography)

The Donald Trump tombstone that artist Brian Andrew Whiteley planted in Central Park in March is now on display in Bushwick. Friday night, we stopped by Christopher Stout Gallery’s pop-up to pay our respects to the man who “Made America Hate Again.” While we were at the opening, we asked attendees to come up with their own epitaph for the Trump campaign. Click through the slideshow to see their responses.

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At Rough Trade’s New Listening Room, Spin Vinyl Without Annoying the Neighbors

The listening room. (Photo courtesy of Sonos)

The listening room. (Photo courtesy of Sonos)

In what’s pretty much a music nerd’s dream come true, AirBnB is offering the chance to stay overnight at Rough Trade. If you’re envisioning Night at the Museum with vinyl records instead of Teddy Roosevelt and Sacagawea, don’t worry, it’s not that sketchy (unless you want it to be, to each their own), and it’s safe to say Ben Stiller won’t be there.

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Gleaning the Cube: Alamo’s Return Delayed, But Astor Fest Won’t Be Boxed In

When the Astor Alive! Festival kicks off Friday, there’ll be a workshop on how to make spinning cubes, a parade featuring the lil’ cubes, and a “cube sticker slam.” But it looks like one thing will be missing: the actual Astor Place cube. The Village Alliance, which is throwing the fest to celebrate the redesign of Astor Place and Cooper Square, had expected the Alamo to make a triumphant return in time for the fest. But today a spokesperson at the city’s Department of Design and Construction tells us that “due to unforeseen logistical issues the scheduled return of the Alamo has been postponed.”

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Call It a Craven Ploy, But This Horror Film Festival Is Snuffing to Sneeze At

Screen Shot 2016-09-14 at 2.53.52 PMTis the season for Lovecraft festivals and flesh-suspension ziplines, but aside from all that, we’re pretty much living in an age of horror. I mean, Stephen King just compared an actual presidential candidate to cthulhu. So, why not have more than one horror film festival? The first Brooklyn Horror Film Festival was announced earlier this month and will take place in mid-October. Now it’s getting a downtown counterpart, FEARnyc, which will bring 65+ horror flicks to Cinema Village from October 21 to 27. And here’s something The Wolfpack will be psyched about: Wes Craven’s widow will appear on his behalf during the awards ceremony.

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Come Out and Watch The Warriors Play in This Glitzy Theater

(Photo: Daniel Maurer)

(Photo: Daniel Maurer)

Expect to see twice as many Warriors costumes this Halloween. On Thursday, Sept. 15, the 1979 cult classic about a street gang’s epic trek from the Bronx to Coney Island is screening in Brighton Beach, a stone’s throw from the Wonder Wheel. Now, I know what you’re thinking: The Warriors again? At this point, the film is pretty much every lazy programmer’s default pick for a rooftop film or midnight movie. (It was, after all, #15 on Entertainment Weekly‘s list of top 50 cult movies.) But if you’re not Warriored out, there’s one big reason to come out and plaaaay: The flick is playing at a posh, historic theater you’ve probably never set foot in, and there’ll be a q&a with cast members. Can you dig it?

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Clayton Patterson Brings Back the Clayton Cap With a Little Help From His Friends

claytoncap_skull_black-1_2048x2048The most exciting thing to happen in fashion this month has nothing to do with Fashion Week. Far, far away from the uptown tents, Clayton Patterson is bringing back the Clayton cap.

In case you missed the history lesson in Captured, the documentary about the Lower East Side documentarian, the Clayton cap was created in 1986, when Patterson discovered a couple of mom-and-pop shops on Avenue A that did iron-ons and embroidery. “A lot of the street gangs would go in there and cut out their letters and iron them on their jackets,” Clayton remembered. When Clayton realized the shop could also make custom baseball hats, the first Clayton cap was born.

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Exhibit Honors That Big Weird Spaceship Thing on the Way to the Airport

NYSP-card-front-PNG

If you’re heading out to Flushing Meadows-Corona Park tonight to see the US Open men’s semifinals, make sure to grab Fuku’s McEnroe and also take a moment to admire the New York State Pavilion’s $3 million paint job. The long overdue touchup was completed last year as part of a $6 million effort to begin restoring those big, weird concrete structures you always see on your way to the airport. One of the 50 amazing things about the ’64-’65 World’s Fair, the Tent of Tomorrow served as a performance and exhibition space while the Astro-View observation towers were the tallest thing in the fair.

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Look Behind You! It’s the First Brooklyn Horror Film Festival

Screen Shot 2016-09-06 at 9.24.55 AMFirst Brooklyn gets an “institute of horror studies” and now, on the weekend of October 14, a horror film festival. Ministry is right– everyday is Halloween!

No, but seriously, the first annual Brooklyn Horror Film Festival looks so much better than watching a midnight screening of The Shining for the thousandth time. (All Kubrick and no contemporary Icelandic indie horror makes Jack a dull boy.) The inaugural program boasts two world premieres, five U.S. premieres, an art show and scary storytelling competition at Catland, a performance by celebrated spookster Grady Hendrix, and a film slate so head-spinning it’s like a scene from Poltergeist.

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Next Week in Comedy: Seinfeld, Space and Singing

TUESDAY

(Flyer via Facebook)

Mary Houlihan & The Yellow Dress in “This Could Be Anything”
Tuesday September 6, 8 p.m. at Over the Eight: FREE. 
As the name suggests this one is a bit of a mystery. It’s a musical, but who knows what about? Written by indie pop musician Dan Weiss (with his band the Yellow Dress) and comedian Mary Houlihan, whose regular show, Cartoon Monsoon, usually includes a fair amount of funny singing, it definitely has a lot going for it. Sure, “comedy musicals” don’t always end well, but I have a feeling this one is going to be good.

It’ll also feature comedians like Carmen Christopher, Susan Casey, Pat Wise, Tim Platt and Joe Rumrill. As if that’s not enough, there’ll also be songs about “friendship and bravery.” If you’re curious to know any more details, then I guess you’ll just have to go and find out for yourself on Tuesday.

FRIDAY

(Flyer via UCBtheatre.com)

(Flyer via UCBtheatre.com)

Improvised Seinfeld
Friday September 9, 7:30 p.m. at UCB Chelsea: $10. 
Do you ever imagine Seinfeld still on TV? It’s a pie-in-the-sky dream so long as Seinfeld is busy getting coffee and complaining about college students, but it’s nice to think about, right? If, however, that’s not enough to scratch your Seinfeldian itch, then fear not, because there’s always Improvised Seinfeld.

At this semi-regular show, former UCB Maude team, Bellevue (who wrote a pretty good new episode of Seinfeld a while ago), perform a fully improvised episode of Seinfeld based on an audience suggestion. I’ve seen the show a few times myself and it is startlingly close to the real thing—the tone, the episode structure and even the actors playing the main cast (the Elaine stand-in, Cathryn Mudon, is an especially close dead-ringer for Julia Louis Dreyfus). So if you can’t even imagine it, then stop thinking about it and see it for yourself.

(Flyer via the Annoyance Theater)

(Flyer via the Annoyance Theater)

Deep Space Live!
Friday September 9, 8 p.m. at the Annoyance Theater: $10. 
In an effort to cope with the impenetrable loneliness of space travel, NASA scientist Sam Weiss (played by comedian Sam Weiss) has taken to hosting a weekly late night talk show. Because, honestly, what better way to deal with the existential ennui of being thousands of miles away from any other human beings than hosting a talk show?

This week also happens to be your last chance to catch Deep Space Live, which will feature guest appearances from the likes of the voices in Weiss’s head, some aliens and comedians including Sam Taggart and Ben Hosley.

SUNDAY

(Flyer via Facebook)

(Flyer via Facebook)

The Famous Awards
Sunday September 11, 6 p.m. at the Bushwick Public House: FREE. 
Next Sunday, comedian Kady Ruth Ashcraft will host the first ever Famous Awards—a one-of-a-kind award show that will celebrate and crown the world’s most famous individuals. You know, those traditionally unsung heroes of this world. Selfless and brave, every one of them.

The event promises to feature “a red carpet, step and repeat, champagne toasts, and most importantly, awards celebrating the 2016 accomplishments of famous people.” The show itself is free, but also be aware that it is 100% black tie mandatory.

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Watch Some Legends of Jazz, Rock, and Poetry Take a Crack at Kerouac

Okay, so you’re probably too cool, these days, to admit you were ever into Jack Kerouac (now you know him mostly as the grumpy old guy who slurred to William F. Buckley that he always voted Republican), but remember for a moment the first time you cracked On the Road and spent the next weeks telling all your peeps that the only ones for you are the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars.

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You Don’t Need to Be a Mind-Reader to Know Psychic Twin From Psychic TV

(Photoshop by John Ambrosio, images via Psychic TV, Psychic Twin)

(Photoshop by John Ambrosio, images via Psychic TV, Psychic Twin)

Ok, give me your hands and I’ll read your mind. Hmmm. Interesting. You don’t know the difference between Psychic Twin and Psychic TV? That’s understandable, really—their names are pretty close, and they both have new material out and upcoming shows. I don’t know why you put this shortcoming in the “deepest shame box” in your subconscious, but I do know that the latest installment of Bands Apart can help you get it out of there.

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