(Flyer via The Gateway / Facebook)

(Flyer via The Gateway / Facebook)

Are you looking for spooky Halloween-themed shows? Well, you’ve come to the wrong place. Stay tuned for our guide to legit everything worth going to this Hallows’ weekend. But for now, sate yourself with these totally, 100 percent normal show happenings. Well, strictly speaking they’re not “normal” at all, but you can pretend like it’s not Sexy Something Day for just one minute and stuff your ears with tunes instead of candy corn.

Tequila Tuesday 

Tuesday, Oct. 27, 7 pm at the Gateway: $5 

This bb venue smack dab on the Bushwick/Bed-Stuy border is only a wee one in the sense that they’ve just opened their doors this month. Usually the shows are free here (well, at least for as long as this opening extravaganza extends), but the Gateway has invoked a meager fee for the touring band. If you missed it, read all about The Gateway here. Otherwise, press on: their Tuesday night show is complete with a bunch of Tristate-area piss punk bands and one Midwest visitor here to show these kids how it’s done.

Opening act Language will get your heart pummeling against your ribcage in preparation for the rest of the eve with their post-punk screamers and jammers. There’s some degree of melody here, a small piece of reality you’re entitled to hold on to for at least a bit longer.

Psychiatric Metaphors promises to launch you straight into space (if you weren’t already on your way there) with their echo-riddled, psych-garage sound. Heavier on the shout vocals than most psych bands might ever dare, these guys are edging toward bad trip territory. “Groovy” is not the word you’re looking for– it’s more of a psychedelic heart attack. But life ain’t a smooth cruise down the love canal every day of the week, and the Psychiatric Metaphors are here to remind you that breakdowns can and will happen.

Things start to pick up, as you might expect, with a band called Shitstorm. Faster than all hell, like a lot of Midwest punk bands these guys, they’ve found success in those distorted, pipsqueak-high vocal squirts we’re used to hearing from the likes of The Coneheads. That isn’t to say Shitstorm are nearly at all as weird as their fellow countrymen, actually the contrary: they have DGAF written all over them, but their guitars actually run the gamut of simple garage to punk– stuff we’ve heard a bunch before– and their songs about fast cars and “Hey Little Julie” reveal their soft spot for cutesy Ramones stuff.

But all of this could be total conjecture: everyone knows there can be a vast crevice between live shows and slick, overly-produced records, but equally so– some bands’ live routines can be unrecognizable as the same track list from their lo-fi tape. I mean, how could this not sound weird?

New York Tapes take a note or three from Dead Moon, while headliners Super FM cap off the night by captaining the deepest foray yet into twisted slop punk. Twiddly, twangy-fingered guitars; indiscernible, echoing screams barely rising above feedback and scratches– it all adds up to a mix of Thee Oh Sees’ acid-garage rock and Midwest-style paper napkin, holy-shoes, moth-eaten coats punk. But wait! They’re from New York Shitty– this bodes well for us.


(Flyer via Facebook)

Glue, Strutter, JJ Doll, Slav

Thursday Oct. 29th, 8 pm at Palisades: $8

There’s an absolutely filthy hardcore punk scene stewing in Austin right now. These bands are less about the unadulterated, hyper-masculine ra ra of NYCHC, instead steeped in a witchy, Luciferian kind of outlook and taking more notes from Australian gross punk than the sometimes testosterone-spewing American tradition of hardcore. On the extreme end of this non-NYC side are bands like Burnt Skull. That’s not to say there are any hard feelings– these guys definitely like to share the merry-go-round. But if you close your eyes and listen to Glue, you’ll definitely be all, “Oh yeah, this is some stuff from that Dawn of Humans scene.” Surprise, though, guys! Glue’s from Austin.

Now that your gasps are out of the way, consider Strutter. It’s a perfect name for this GG-sounding hardcore band, another act from Austin. I can totally picture frontman Sam Pennington swaggering like a horny pigeon on stage. Get it girl.

And dunno if this is for serious, but according to the Facebook event page (Facebook never lies, right?) looks like there’s going to be an appearance by a creepy (and vaguely racist?) doll fondly knick-named “JJ Doll,” or (more likely) a band whose name unfortunately matches up with said doll. Enormous… floating… question mark. Their demos are a few months old, but Slav have managed to keep the thick layer of rot atop these tracks completely in-tact. With radio-ready hits like “Yes, Officer” these guys are sure to be a crowd pleaser.

(Flyer via Trans-Pecos / Facebook)

(Flyer via Trans-Pecos / Facebook)

Yvette, Kill Alters, Macula Dog, Hair

Thursday Oct. 29th, 8 pm at Trans-Pecos: $8 

If I were back in the ’90s, making a psycho-thriller about a psychiatrist who ventures into the subconscious mind of her patient, a dangerous killer, I would cast Jennifer Lopez as the shrink and enlist Yvette to write the original soundtrack. Why? Because the band manages to master tension and grittiness and evoke a sort of epic, operatic expanse. Their sound is also slightly futuristic industrial, perfect for Miss Lopez’s twisted adventure into creep land.

Expect some witchy drone chants appropriate for blasting during a seance. The music of Kill Alters might actually speed the sorcery up. It’s gotta be hard to make electronic gurgles and blips sound at all sacred, but KA manages it.

And now for something completely different: Macula Dog. This is ’90s-MIDI nostalgia and the upward, outward thrust of the Internet wrapped into one twisted, multi-layered, DMT trip of a sound. It’s like the continuation of Devo’s mission, but in the complete absence of rock n’ roll: if Jerry Paper is post-post-post-post-indie, Macula Dog is post-post-post-post-punk.


Beats Delight, Vol. 2

Monday, Nov. 2, 9 pm – 12 am  at Cameo Gallery: $10 

Well, gee whiz– this sounds fun: “Beats Delight is a new monthly multi-dimensional experience held at Williamsburg’s Cameo Gallery.” The events feature smooth jams from live acts and DJs, visual projections, and paintings. Too bad the longstanding DIY venue will close at the end of November, essentially ending the history of DIY in Williamsburg. Well, there’s a new DIY comedy space here, at least…

The point being, gobble up the last of the non-corporate music scene here while you still can. The angelic blend of R&B and electro-beats from Adesuwa (aka Denitia Odigie– a Brooklyn-based singer-songwriter and producer by way of Texas) are guaranteed to put you in instant relax mode, no matter how HIGH STRUNG you might feel at the moment. Go ahead, give her a try. Adesuwa’s deep, rich voice complements the washed-out beats for a mellowed, thought-provoking effect.

Brooklyn-based producer Ateller certainly expanded my own ideas about where beats are presently. But that just shows how much I know. These tracks are expansive, dribbling and almost ticklish– like HD raindrops for your ears.