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Nevermind the 190+ international galleries showing — with food vendors like Roberta’s, Dimes, and Marlow & Sons, the trek to this year’s Frieze Art Fair is almost totally worth it. But let’s face it, trying to Uber it off of Randall’s Island is enough to drive you to the nearby psychiatric center. In fact, the experience can be so harrowing for art-world blue bloods that Korakrit Arunanondchai has installed massage chairs throughout the tent, as you can see above. But for those who just don’t have it in them to make the trip to Frieze when there are so many alternatives, we’ve rounded up this year’s most eye-grabbing pieces.

Our first stop was at the Roberta’s drink tent, where we saw some art that, let’s face it, was on par with a lot of the stuff we ended up seeing in the booths.

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Here’s a look at the beer garden.

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If you’re on the fence about Frieze’s $44 entry free, rest assured it covers an art therapy session. Here at Gavin Brown’s booth, those traumatized from having to pay $20 for parking are sublimating their rage into drawing dots for artist Jonathan Horowitz. The dots are then nailed to the wall and sold in groups of 100, each for $100,000. Apparently Leo DiCaprio is a fan.

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Here are the oysters that Marlow & Sons was serving. Just kidding, these are by Eric Sidner.

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These dogs, by Kris Lemsalu, refuse to be Instagrammed.

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But they’re nowhere near as freaked out as this guy, made from urethane foam, plastic and feathers by Paola PIVI.

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Maybe he’s running from this, erm, “spire of the sky” by Shanghai artist Xu Zhen.

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You’ll never guess the title of this one by Richard Artschwager. Okay, fine, it’s “Exclamation Point”!

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Kader Attia’s reproduction of the Kaaba, a Muslim holy site, sold at auction for $121,875 last year. For that price, I’d rather get 2,978 full cans of beer and empty them myself.

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Here’s a close-up of the installation at Lehmann Maupin’s booth.

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Full Regalia, by Sheila Hicks, is made from natural linen and embroidery cotton.

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This piece by none other than Nick Cave is definitely going to be my Halloween costume this year.

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I mean, the sequined pants alone:

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Spoiler alert, this is the bad guy in the new season of True Detective:

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Hey look, I caught the booth assistant at Temnikova & Kasela napping. Just kidding. It’s more Kris Lemsalu.

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Here’s an eroded Bulls jacket by Daniel Arsham. It’s made from rose quartz fragments, marble fragments, hydrostone, and the essence of Scottie Pippen.

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This one by Takeshi Murata really Pacs a punch.

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And this one by Pawel Althamer really crosses a line.

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Finally, someone might want to tell Barbara Kruger her iPhone is a clone.

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