A Swimming Cities party. (Photo: Nick Normal/Flickr)
McSweeney’s just posted a satirical piece titled “Audience Instructions for Our Immersive/Experimental Theatre Production in an Abandoned Middle School in Bushwick.” It reads like something out of The Burning Bush, but it maybe should’ve taken its audience insturctions (“it is recommended that you self-administer an enema at least three hours prior to the start of the performance”) just a little further. Because it isn’t the most absurd event-description copy we’ve read today.
That honor goes to an invite for a “Time Travelers Prom” at “Chicken Hut High School.” After thrice reading the invite below, we’re still not sure what we’re being invited to, or what “caveman liquor” is. (Dare to dream.) But we’ll 100% be there, because it’s being put on by Swimming Cities, the merry pranksters responsible for launching flotsam flotillas down the Hudson and other such antics.
Read the McSweeney’s bit, then read the invite below, and you tell us which is more ridiculous.
TIME TRAVELERS PROM
* CHICKEN HUT *First ever inter-generational Time travelers prom, at the intersection of 2015 and Chicken Hut High School!
Seasoned time travelers, circumvent the absorbent costs of outfitting yourself in era appropriate attire, you need not bother, this event is time travelers only, dress in your period formals.
Arrive at the inter-chronoligical fulcrum of the dark mater expansion point known colloquially as FRI January 16 “2015”Music and attire from the last 29 years will be strictly prohibited (vinyl only) thats “1986 – 2049” Not permitted, seriously.
Dance all night in the Chicken Hut High gymnasiumDJ’s- Dirtyfinger (gold whistle) & the James Mulry
Bring a date! Or the gym teacher!
Get your prom picture taken!
Drink punch spiked With caveman liquor
Do big kid stuff under the bleachers!
Formal attire mandatory! (irregardless of era)This tenuous space out of time is the strict dominion of, and shall be chaperoned by Fantasy Grandma!
“so no hands on the cans boys” ruler enforcedNOTE: Avoid confusion, please bring only 2015 era us currency, (sorry). Be there or be cubed
WARNING: watch out for the ruffians from our rival Down-World High, they will impregnate everything.
Costume suggestions, any era:
guidance councilor
lunch lady
principal
coach
class dropout
cheerleader
disco dork
low self-e-steam punk