For those of you preparing for the spoken word romances of our dystopian future society a la Spike Jonze’s Her, we’ve got two Valentine’s Day happenings you don’t need a physical body to enjoy.

First, from 7 to 9 p.m. at 384 Broome Street, The Poetry Brothel is offering what its very own iteration of the “quickie,” in which you get to sidle up beside the “Poetry Whore” of your choosing and bask in 15 minutes worth of his or her sweet, sweet spoken words. In this case, physical existence doesn’t hurt the experience, as there are calligraphist body painters present to leave you with a parting gift.
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