Pink Olive (Photo: Paula Ho)

Lingerie aside, there’s nothing quite as sexy as penning deep, mad feels onto paper. Whether you’re professing romantic love, friend love, or even self love, we’ve hunted down the best stationery stores for the most poignant, passionate, and tastefully blunt Valentine’s Day cards. So, make like an E L James and put your brain (and metaphors) to good use.

Pink Olive
439 E. 9th St., East Village

Tucked well between First Avenue and Avenue A, this little gem caters to all things cutesy. Cards, stickers, ribbons, glitter and even a baby section — they’ve got the whole shebang.

Casey Rubber Stamps
322 E. 11th St., East Village

Throw it back old-school style and DIY some cards. Casey’s stamps are made from real red rubber, “not the horrible plastic material,” which he hates. Oh, and custom stamps are an option.

Paper Presentation
23 W. 18th St., Flatiron

If you can squeeze between giggly customers who have a hard time peeling away from the wall of love letters, it’s very likely you’ll find yourself a sassy Hallmark-opposite card. The clear winner: caricatures of Anne Boleyn and Henry VII with the caption, “Got History?”

Greenwich Letterpress
39 Christopher St., West Village

Fashion lovers rejoice! Cards here pay homage to the great Carrie Bradshaw. If you don’t like what see, get something custom made via letterpress.

Snail Mail Café
505 Franklin Ave., Bedford-Stuyvesant

This pop-up shop has been racking up some major . Back by popular demand for its second weeks-leading-up-to-Valentine’s Day stint, the all-in-one coffee shop sells Brooklyn-sourced stationary and even mails your letters for you. Hear that, lazy bums? It returns tonight from 4pm to 8pm, with $5 beer and wine.