(Photo: Amy Lombard)
The majority of the press surrounding Michael Alig’s release from prison has primarily dealt with the crime that landed him there for 17 years: the co-murder and dismemberment of fellow club kid Andre “Angel” Melendez.
Anyone who’s seen Party Monster knows that story. What’s curious is how Alig plans to use his new freedom – which, two weeks in, doesn’t yet feel like freedom at all.
“I literally left from the van from the facility into a van packed with my friends and a news crew,” says Alig after we meet up with him in the East Village, one of his old haunts. “I went from prison’s watchful eye to three cameras on me asking ‘What does it feel like to be free!?!?!’ and I didn’t even feel free enough to have a natural reaction.”’
It’s been suggested to Alig, who is under the daily care of a court ordered therapist and drug counselor, that if he’s going to be conducting so many interviews (sometimes up to four a day), he should hold off on getting a job for a few months so he can acclimate back into society slowly. So far “slowly” hasn’t been an option for Alig.
“I thought there’d maybe be one or two publications interested, but I honestly had no idea that there’d be people waiting at the gate when I got out, and that TMZ would be following me through the West Village,” he says. “I guess it’s just a different world where there’s so much media now that they need something to fill it up.”
New York’s original club kid is careful to point out that he hopes people are interested in him for the good stuff he did in the first chapter of his life as a party promoter, rather than for what that lifestyle led him to become (a drug addict and a murderer). But he knows better.
“I hope people aren’t mesmerized by the bad things, because that’s sickening to me a little bit,” says Alig. “It never occurred to me that anyone with a rational mind would be celebrating a crime, or celebrating the notoriety of a crime such as this, and yet it seems like people are.”
(Photo: Amy Lombard)
While waiting for Alig outside of Ray’s Candy Store, we had spotted him on the corner fumbling with his notebook, presumably looking for the address where he was to meet us. Wearing gray jeans and a red t-shirt reading “Call My Agent,” he seemed an easy mix of nervous, excited, and eager to please.
“Obviously there’s something about my personality, which is why I’ve always done what I’ve done, from planning parties to starting the club kids, that is very needy and attention seeking,” he says. “We were all the same way, my friends and I, and we gravitated towards each other and that’s why the club kids came about. Obviously I can’t say that side of me doesn’t exist, but I’m not crazy for it like I used to be.”
While he can’t help but enjoy the current attention, he can at no time allow himself to forget why he’s receiving it. Playing off the fact that he was called “candy man” in school for selling sweets out of a shoe box, we try to get him to pose with an ice cream cone and he refuses.
“I just have to be very careful,” says Alig. “I don’t ever want to make it seem like I’m making light of the situation or what I’ve done. I’d feel awful if Angel’s brother drove by and saw me smiling and laughing in the sun licking on an ice cream cone. That would be so terrible.”
We move across the street to find a bench to sit on in Tompkins Square Park and he remarks on how everyone is so fashionable. “It used to be that only some people were fabulous and fashionable, but now it seems like everyone is to some degree.”
(Photo: Amy Lombard)
Revisiting the fact that he’s surprised by all the fuss being made about his release, he says that he’s not surprised that a good portion of it has been negative, but that he is shocked by the amount of nasty comments he’s been seeing on the internet following articles that have been coming out.
“I was up until 2 a.m. this morning because of some ridiculous comment on one of the articles on me. Some person was saying that he knew that I had woken up the day Angel was killed with full intention of killing someone that day, and it just happened to be him. It just hit me in the gut like, do people honestly believe that we just woke up that morning and said, ‘You know what? Let’s go kill somebody’? First of all, if that had been the case, we would have hopefully gotten away with it.”
Alig’s plans for the future seem to be split between pitching TV show ideas to places such as MTV and VICE, working on writing projects, and doing mentoring and community outreach work. All of which suggests a fork in the road leading towards his previous life as a social figure and party boy, or towards a new muted, responsible life of remorseful servitude. It’s easy to wonder if he’s conflicted as to which “him” he wants to be now.
“Of course I feel conflicted,” says Alig. “The other day I was at Century 21, which was my first time being in a department store after 17 years, and a part of me felt so excited to be back with my friends, forgiven, and not having to worry. I felt so grateful. And then I’m thinking about Angel’s family and how they’re never going to get him back and here I am at Century 21 buying Calvin Klein socks.”
Everything about his life now is that same mix of bittersweet relief, enjoyment, and painful sadness and shame. “I need to forgive myself if I’m gonna do any good for anybody,” says Alig.
Against his therapists’ wishes, he has been looking into a few mentoring jobs in the city, all of which he’s been turned down for so far. “My friend James St. James said that if I get turned down again that we should just start up our own program, and even though he was probably kidding, I kind of think it’s a good idea.”
Asked about rumors that he may possibly be taking on the role of publicist for The Pizza Underground (the jokey band of Macaulay Culkin, who played Alig in the film about his life and downfall, Party Monster) Alig hinted that any friendship between the two personalities was rocky at best. “Well, according to the Enquirer he’s mad at me for being in the spotlight when he’s not, and that he’s going to use me to get back in. So I don’t know.”
Toward the end of our time together we present Alig with a box of cronuts, having read that trying one was one of the first things he wanted to do after his release. We’d assumed that he’d already had one during his first few days out, but he hadn’t, and upon opening the box he burst into tears.
“Obviously I want this, but I just don’t feel like I deserve it. I mean, it would be horrible not to eat it, but I just feel so awful.”
(Photo: Amy Lombard)
He ate the decadent pastry in between sobs and revealed that he was tempted to not even come back to New York after his release, but that his parole stipulations made it not a possibility. “First of all I had to come back, plus I don’t know where else I could survive,” says Alig. “Los Angeles is so superficial. I mean, New York is, too, but at least here we have a sense of humor about it.”
Our last question to Alig is how he spends his time at the end of the day, and what it feels like when he’s alone with his thoughts at night. “After I’ve done everything I have to do, I allow myself the guilty pleasure of Googling things and going on dating sites,” he says. “I basically keep myself busy until I can’t help but fall asleep. I have to do that because I’m worried about laying in bed and not being able to turn my brain off, and what that’ll feel like then.”
With cronut crumbs on his lips and tears in his eyes, it’s hard not to like Alig. Time will tell if his 17 years in prison will keep him from gaining any more bad notoriety, but it’s easy to believe him when he says that he wants to help people learn from his mistakes.
As we pack up to leave he collects himself and asks when the article will run, and then we watch him walk down Avenue A, on to the next thing.
It seems to me he thinks he still in titled to everything being given to him . I hope he doesn’t make money off his crime and has to work his ass off just to live like so many honest law abiding citizen.I hope he has to work at a fast food joint like the ones he terrorized I want no easy street for this murder ! And dude what is with that haircut?
I’m actually beginning to get more and more curious what Angel’s family thinks about all this press on the guy. But then, maybe they just want to be left alone. They’re the ones who suffered the most through all this. I feel for them.
I am happy as hell he is out and can’t wait to meet him
So fuck you people who are mean..
Follow me on ig though @Roseyinfinity
“I’d feel awful if Angel’s brother drove by and saw me smiling and laughing in the sun licking on an ice cream cone.” So he made a point to cry into a cronut.
What’s with everyone and his hair? I think his hair looks great. It’s adorable and fits his character.
Does anyone else recognize that the people who are telling Michael Alig to stay out of the public eye and go quietly into the background are the same people reading this article and commenting on it? Supply and demand, remember? Everyone, those who love him and those who hate him, should just ignore him. It’s the best thing to do. But we can’t, can we? Just let the man eat his cronut, grow out his hair and perhaps do some good in this world.
Dude need a new haircut. The Ceaser ‘do is lame.
He does seem honestly remorseful and he has done the time he was given.
The thought that is guy is going on dating sites is pretty scary.
If he was truly sorry he would disappear…like freeze.
total psychopath, JSJ probably right, murder premeditated.
Why cant Michael just reenter society quietly, with some modicum of self respect?
Freeze did it…
At the end of the day, we are all all alone when our head hits the pillow at night. We breathe. We shit. We feel. We are all the same.
Sober people– and I am one of them– or people who have never truly been affected by addiction sometimes spare a look down from their self-appointed throne, analyze the behavior of addicts and then think, “That could never be me.” The truth is that it easily could. They analyze behavior to find rationality and meaning where there is none. Or they ask themselves silly questions like, “Why? But, WHY would someone do that?” The hardest part is that there is no answer. This is what sometimes keeps addicts addicts. Crushing guilt.
I can’t undo the actions of high people, but I don’t believe those actions make them evil. It only makes them an addict.
It takes mere seconds to create the kind of question that can never be answered, the kind of finality that can never be resolved. That is how fragile life is. And when Alig goes to sleep at night, he will inevitably be alone with his thoughts.
Like I’ve told my father, best friend and other relatives, there is no peace in that past. They were all always playing with fire. Sometimes the damage is final, but it is already done and cannot be changed. Alig has a chance to move forward and it’s a chance that is not extended to a lot of Americans. I hope that all involved can find peace, forgiveness, contentment and quiet in the unfilled moments of the future. Don’t waste the sunlight.
Well said Katrina- as a recovering addict I find myself identifying with his story, although i never hurt anyone but myself. This man is truly remorseful and has fullfilled his debt to society.
Great article.
I don’t think that wjat he did is glamourous, but he did his time. This article gives a more human impression of Mr. Alig. May he take advantage of this second opportunity of freedom and utilizes it for a good cause.
I think it is complete crap that Alig is being given any attention at all. Yes, he may have been “someone” before he brutally murdered and dismembered a “friend”. If he weren’t white, but his victim was, Alig would never have seen the outside of a prison. Ever.
I hope his new career goes nowhere. But, should it, I hope Angel’s family follows the Son of Sam Law’s changes, and are suing for a cut of any money he makes. No one is going to hire him because he is “nice”, he will be hired for his notoriety for murder, ergo, profiting from a crime.
You would be surprised by how many well known celebrities have been to prison for serious crimes including murder. But those were committed before they were famous and did not make them famous.
If this guy was smart he would use his creativity to start over again as a club promoter or some other artistic endeavor behind the scenes instead of leaning on his former notoriety to get ahead. Then people would really be willing to give him a second chance.
Thanks for this nice, balanced piece on Alig. I’ve been fascinated by him since before his infamy, and I sincerely hope the best for him.
I feel Michael has paid the price for the crime he has committed and deserves a 2nd chance at life. I hope he leads a healthy and some what of a normal life and goes on to be a better person and do great things.
I generally agree with second chances. However, that man is someone who needs no publicity. I think it’s sick that anyone would want to film him in any capacity.
True, he’s done his time and deserves a chance to rebuild & sustain himself now that he’s free. But he should do so quietly and out of the spotlight. I’m really sickened by all the media attention he’s getting and wonder how many other murderers get such an opportunity? All the “positive” stories about him feels like a set up to re-brand his image into something he can later profit off of. At least he seems to acknowledge that no matter what he does, Angel will always be dead.
@Suzinne not sure his crime, aka the murder of Angel Melendez that includes the the dismembering of a body and disposing of it in the hudson really warrants a second chance. Would you want to spend any time in close quarters with Michael?
If I co-murder and dismember someone, can I get a box of cronuts too?
michael does deserve his life back.
people make mistakes
This is one of the better pieces on bedfordandbowery. Thanks
I think you guys are super shitty for making news out of this monster
On the surface, he seems to have learned some really painful lessons. At this point what’s important to remember is that he does have talent and with this window of opportunity, hopefully he can channel his creativity to be of service to others.
Michael’s committed the crime, but did the time so he’s entitled to a new start. 17 years imprisonment is a lot of time for introspection, and hopefully for Mr. Alig he’s grown up – at least he looks like he may have.
Michael Alig can’t undo the past, but he can be a better person in his future.
Aww i love him, not for the crime, but for who he seems to be.
Anyway, There’s always gonna be those idiots who make hurtful comments…even if it is a story about how a baby died, you know SOMEBODY is gonna write a terrible comment. Hope he doesn’t harp on it.
Whilst I deep down share your liberal view on this, to say 17 years is a lot of time for introspection niggles me.
I think he will most likely (and deserves to) analyse those actions to his death bed.
And just to add, I wish the guy the best of luck with the rest of his life. I just meant it’s not something he can now leave behind completely.
Let’s not forget that ‘Angel’ was a dealer, and how many times have drug addicts killed their dealers? The only difference in this case is that those who committed the crime were infamous and it was widely reported.
I believe that Michael has shown remorse in all of his interviews, and if it had been reported that he was ‘weeping and wailing’, then he would’ve been called a hypocrite etc.
I really hope that Michael is given the chance of a career in whatever he chooses to do. I think he’s a very smart guy and I would love to see what he can do now that he’s clean & sober.