Red Dawn II

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Shows: Forecast Predicts Raining Men; Enigmatic Band Releases New Tracks

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Welcome back to IRL. Here’s to hoping you had a good one being equal parts proud to live in a country where you don’t have to think too hard about what went into your readily available Apple phone and palm oil snacks, and all “pshhh” about the whole affair. We’re also fingers-crossed that you didn’t go too DIY on fireworks after a failed reconnaissance mission ‘cross the Pennsylvania border (really, you gotta know a guy to get anything close to decent fireworks ’round these parts)– because fingers and toes are maybe more valuable than even the most awe-inducing homemade mortar blast or Roman candle to your unsuspecting friend’s face. In the interest of such things, maybe you didn’t get your kicks, but fear not, there are better, much safer ways to get your thrills via rock n’ roll. Take this week to scoot your butt to some shows and allow yourself to revel. Believe us, it’ll make up at least a little bit for this increasingly less-explosive holiday.

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Five Shows That’ll Make Your Friends Down At SXSW Supremely Jelly

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Oh hi, did you forget SXSW was happening this week? Of course you did. It’s not like you actually would have wanted to go anyway. Austin is, like sooooo over anyway you say? Uh huh, yup. Cool your jets, kids, we’ve seen this act before. It’s OK, you’ve just got a wicked case of the FOMOs. But don’t prepare your death mask just yet– there is hope. A cure comes in the form of a bunch of great shows happening this week and beyond. Sure, some of these bands are picking up and heading south to Slackerville as soon as they wrap up their shows here, but you know what’s cool about that? You get to tell your holidaying friends in Texas (aka the jerks that freaking left you behind to wallow in loserdom) that you already saw most of the bands they’re going to see and that you’re just positive they’ll be worn out by the time they hit Austin. Then you can do that little kissy emoji or maybe even the hairflip one if you’re feeling extra, extra sassy.

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