So, we dunno about you, but we certainly slept on the Death Grips shows, both of which sold out faster than you can say, “What the hell? I thought they broke up?” One’s happening at Webster Hall on July 7 and another at Brooklyn Masonic Temple on the 8th, just in case you think you have a chance of weaseling your way in. But the rest of us are just going to have to settle for a bunch of other great shows coming up, though keep in mind most of them are sandwiching the weekend. Coz it’s our Great Nation’s Birthday Celebration on Saturday, in case your sense of time is already shot from all the Jell-O shots, Cat Hair Pills, and dips in the East River after chilling at our borough’s sickest yacht club, all of which are required in heavy doses to live your best summer ever (these are actually things we’re doing, don’t sneer). Hence missing the party boat straight to Death Grips. Le sigh. You live and you learn.
Boy oh boy this weekend’s gonna be a wild one. There’s a lot of dark energy floating around right now. People have reached their breaking point with winter and it’s hard not to feel like something’s bound to give at any moment. Call me a truther, but I feel like ISIS might have something to do with this one. I mean they’re definitely the people behind “the dress,” am I right? Something so dull and inconsequential was the perfect way to distract people from the realities of war and global distress. Is that a glowing revelation for you or what? Well, sorry about that– but we suggest you banish your fear and channel all anxiety and doom into bobbing your head or grinding at any one of these rad shows. We promise you Suicide and Pharmakon will invoke way realer terror than “the dress.”