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The Ties that Bind Network of Underground Artists, Found in an EV Hair Salon

(Photo by Kavitha Surana)

(Photo by Kavitha Surana)

I don’t know about you, but sometimes checking out one of those boutiquey hair salons can feel like a walking into a staid Chelsea art gallery– the kind of place where you could hear a pin drop, and so would the girl with ungodly, shiny/straight hair who’s glaring at you from the back.

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No Sweat if Your Weiner Got Soaked Last Week, Sizzling Wieners On the Way

Scene from "Weiner" (Image via NY mag)

Scene from “Weiner” (Image via NY mag)

It was kind of ironic when the sold-out, sneak-peek screening of Weiner sputtered out, turning into a glitchy, hallucinatory version of itself at Rooftop Films’ Industry City screening last week. While everyone else seemed to be weathering the drizzle just fine, the projector wasn’t so resilient.

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Get Your LOLz on Tonight at Special Meet the Regulars Edition of Broken Comedy

"Meet the Regulars" out now (Image via Sky Horse Publishing)

“Meet the Regulars” out now (Image via Sky Horse Publishing)

Perhaps your idea of a night out at Greenpoint’s Bar Matchless includes drunkenly windmill punching your way through the crowd, loudly sighing when you realize that literally every seat in the house is taken, then dodging skeevy dudes who try to buy your drinks, and having to resort to physically batting them away when they throw money at the bartender anyway, apparently having misinterpreted your “shove off” through the loud din of god-knows-what kind of music to mean “let’s shove” (or maybe you’re one of those skeevy fellows– in which case, uh, sorry).

If all this sounds scary-familiar, then maybe it’s time you see another side of Matchless. Actually, there’s no better time than the present (i.e. tonight, at 8 pm) to get your foot in the door on a night when that foot is much less likely to get groped.

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Dinosaur Theft in Bushwick; Brooklyn Getting Its First Apple Store

(Photo: Nicole Disser)

(Photo: Nicole Disser)

A real estate firm purchased 103 St. Mark’s Place, a six-story building, for $11.5 million. [Commercial Observer]

Thursday evening, seven handmade dinosaur costumes were looted from the House of Yes in Bushwick. The venue is offering a $300 cash reward for their safe return. [Brooklyn Paper]

Brooklyn’s first Apple store will reportedly debut soon, likely at 247 Bedford Avenue in Williamsburg. [Brownstoner]

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The Barge Bar Has Officially Made Landfall, To Welcome Booze Pirates Onboard Soon

Thar she blows (Photo: Nicole Disser)

Thar she blows (Photo: Nicole Disser)

It was a long, hard winter which, honestly, now that I’m looking back on it, I managed to block most of it out. But dare I say that spring has perhaps been worse, and not necessarily because of the fits-n-starts weather that teased all of us into thinking life was about to go our way (yeah right). Instead, it was the uncertainty of whether or not the Barge Bar was ever going to reopen along the Greenpoint waterfront.

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Still Some Tix Up for Grabs at Vulture’s Poptastic Culture Festival this Weekend

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We were so busy sifting through the mounds of stuff out there to keep you out-n-about this weekend– from Essex Street Market’s Block Party to the Ukranian Festival to a bunch of gentrification art shows– that we almost almost forgot to mention a biggie on the scene. But never fear, dear pop culture lovers, this weekend also has your name on it.

Our friends over at Vulture, New York‘s culture blog, are kicking off a two-day festival tomorrow with media luminary peeps like Trever Noah, Shonda Rhimes, Sarah Silverman, and Fred Armisen, among others, in attendance.

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Hail Mary, Not so Full of Grease: Upscale Grace-y Spoon Comes to Greenpoint

(Photo by Evan Sung, courtesy of Hail Mary)

(Photo by Evan Sung, courtesy of Hail Mary)

Plenty of upscale diners have hit the food scene as of late– for one, there’s Juno, the Bushwick restaurant that John Barclay (founding dude at Bossa Nova Civic Club) recently pulled out of– and there was even a short-lived spot called Amancay’s Diner that was, well, a bit more of a downscale kind of place, with a spin-the-bottle setup and an owner who was better known for throwing jello-wrestling parties than his food.

But Hail Mary– a new Greenpoint restaurant that opened on Wednesday night in the former home of 68 and then subsequently (briefly too) Hook & Cleaver which was run by Chopped chef Diane DiMeo– is pushing the diner concept even further with their avant-garde take on the American everyman classic.

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‘Passport’ to Planet Booze, Where Rivers of Craft Cocktails Flow Free (Er, Two-for-One)

Via Passport Program

Via Passport Program

It’s forecast to rain all weekend (boo), but today the weather gods are giving us a pretty tantalizing taste of the summer vibes around the corner. And we all know what that means: soaking up drinks, drinks, and more draaanks galore.

The Passport Program is a not-too-shabby way to make your summer imbibing a little bit cheaper, especially if your #goals this summer include expanding your cocktail repertoire and hitting new bars on the drink scene.

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Slava Ukraini Y’all, It’s the 40th-Annual Saint George Ukrainian Festival

(Photo courtesy of Saint George Ukrainian Festival)

(Photo courtesy of Saint George Ukrainian Festival)

It’s officially feelin’ like almost-summertime, and you know what that means–  more ice cream and more murders. We trust you’re all aware that higher temps mean an uptick in lickin’ that delicious gift of mother cow teat and an increase in violent crime along with “human conflict” in general.

So if you’re feeling an incident of bad behavior coming on, it’s best to preemptively repent and do something cute, cultural, and community-oriented to quiet your demons– this weekend, get thee to the Saint George Ukrainian Festival, aka the East Village-based Slavic block party to rule them all. It helps that a century-old Ukrainian Catholic Church will be cowering over you, which– no matter what your religious (or non-religious) affiliation– is guaranteed to make you feel far too guilty to commit any dastardly deeds.

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Get ‘Gentrifucked’ in Bushwick With Sunset Park ‘Boom Bap’ Hip-Hop Crew

gentrifucked

Rising rents and changing neighborhoods got you down? Tonight head over to Bushwick’s main-squeeze community space, Mayday, for an art and music fest to commiserate on our supremely “gentrifucked” city.

The show (which, let’s be honest, will be less misery and more party)  is organized by Buendia Brooklyn, a collective of local rappers, graffiti artists, and MCs operating out of Sunset Park– a neighborhood that’s still (somewhat) insulated from twee cocktail bars and doggy spas. (They even have a non-ironic bowling alley!)

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Benefit Tonight for W-Burg Fire Victims; Top NYC Vintage Shops

(Nicole Disser)

(Nicole Disser)

IDIO Gallery will host a musical benefit tonight for those displaced by March’s Dekalb Avenue fire. Tickets are $8 to $10. [Bushwick Daily]

The Department of Homeless Services is renting rooms in BKLYN House, a luxe new Bushwick hotel, for New Yorkers in need of shelter. [DNA Info]

A 19-story apartment building will rise at 275 South Street on the Lower East Side. [Bowery Boogie]

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Yer Fast-Approaching Future in Music

(Image via Claudio Simonetti's Goblin/ Facebook)

(Image via Claudio Simonetti’s Goblin/ Facebook)

Claudio Simonetti’s Goblin
Tuesday May 24, 8 pm at the Marlin Room, Webster Hall: $25
Goblin– the late ’70s Italian band best known for their amazingly spooky soundtracks, written for the Italian art-house horror master, Dario Argento– really needs no introduction. However, Claudio Simonetti’s Goblin might call for some explaining.

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