CHP Fresh Poster Brooklyn

(Photo: CHP)

We’re still holding. Cat Hair Pills, that is. After answering a mysterious flyer posted in Bed-Stuy last week and being directed to One Last Shag, where we acquired pills stuffed with cat hair, we couldn’t decide what to do with them. Throw them in the garbage? Toss them in the East River? Feed them to ourselves or our roommate or some cat lady we know? We had more questions for the Cat Hair Pill sorcerer. Admittedly, our journalism only “scratches the surface” and we’re no closer to discovering the Cat Hair Pillducer(s)’s identity, but we at least have a slightly better understanding of their designs on this world as well as some up-close-and-personal photos of the contributing cats.

BB_Q(1) Do you work at One Last Shag?

BB_A(1) We do not work at One Last Shag but we very much appreciate their Dark ‘n Stormies.

(Photo: CHP)

(Photo: CHP)

BB_Q(1) How many Cat Hair Pills have you distributed so far?

BB_A(1)We prefer not to disclose any exact numbers, but in the past month, Cat Hair Pills have been delivered all over the US of A and to every continent except Africa and Antarctica (although we are very hopeful that we will have African and Antarctican orders soon).

BB_Q(1) How are the cats treated whose hair you farm?

BB_A(1) Our cat hair is harvested in a 100% humane and sustainable method. Cat A and Cat B are extremely fond of harvesting and are treated exceptionally well. They have a cat fountain and have been on an airplane. They had a layover in Dallas.

BB_Q(1) How much cat hair do you have access to?

BB_A(1) At our current production level, we have an unlimited supply of cat hair.

(Photo: CHP)

(Photo: CHP)

BB_Q(1)So we’ve read some theories about the Cat Hair Pills, but what are they supposed to do? And c’mon, what are they?

BB_A(1)Excellent questions. Just as the CatHairPiller seeks to understand his purpose, so does the Cat Hair Pill. Perhaps their purposes are intertwined and perhaps their brief crossing is wholly without meaning. Regardless, Cat Hair Pills. Cat Hair Pills are gelatin capsules filled with cat hair.

BB_Q(1) Have you gotten any feedback from people who have taken the pills? Good or bad?

BB_A(1) We have gotten much feedback from fellow CatHairPillers, but all Cat Hair Pill paths are different, and we daren’t compare.

(Photo: CHP)

(Photo: CHP)

BB_Q(1) Do you have any new products on the horizon?

BB_A(1)We will soon debut something new: CatHairPillsSport.  CatHairPillsSport is a Cat Hair Pill carrying case designed with the modern Cat Hair PIl-gram’s active lifestyle in mind.

BB_Q(1) Somehow we got the feeling Cat Hair Pills might go well with a phrostie— wait are Cat Hair Pills this summer’s phrostie? Would you recommend washing a Cat Hair Pill down with this “psychojuice?”

BB_A(1) We have never had a Phrostie but we like their business model.